[ it isn't until he catches sight of his gold-tipped fingers that Rook realizes that he has shifted at all, and that Jiho isn't appalled by him at all like this. not that he thought the other would be but-- well it was a change. the smile on his face softens, something quietly accepting, as Jiho runs his hands through his hair.
Rook leans in to kiss him, softly.]
I love you too, Ji. [ and so much more. he understands what Jiho is saying with having so much to say, knows that he would do whatever he could to make sure that he was understood. ] C'mon, let's wash this and get some ointment on you then, and I can explain the nuances of binding yourself to my sorry ass.
[ not that he moves at all, content to stay here under the spray with Jiho in his arms a little while longer. he feels-- safe. wanted.]
[his colors have changed, the warm tan that jiho's always loved turning into a brighter gold. there are strange wings on his back. the color of his eyes are different, golden and overbright, a reminder that he's not the human that he often seems to be. not anymore.
but his smile is the same. his lips, when he leans in to kiss the assassin, are the same. it is rook, and that's the only thing that matters.]
I guess I should know those things. Probably important.
[but he's the same kind of sloth, content to just touch rook with the water streaming over their skin, kiss him the same way he always kisses him. maybe even a little deeper. but he knows that eventually one of them has to be the stronger man. so jiho stands, hands locked tightly with rook's as he helps pull him up. there's a strength there that suggests that even if he was falling over a cliff and down into nothingness, jiho would hold tight forever.
they finish washing, and drying, until jiho is sitting on the edge of the bed, sweatpants on, with rook behind his shoulder.]
[ the words are nearly drowned out by the sound of the water, by the kisses that Rook leaves against Jiho's lips. they get up eventually though, the demon letting himself be pulled and led from the shower, more than happy to follow Jiho wherever he went. it was ridiculous and absurd but so true, the would follow Jiho to the gates of heaven even if it meant his demise.
but for now-- for now it just means towels and warm sweatpants, the ointment fragrant and familiar in his palms as he presses it as gently as he can into Jiho's skin.]
Hmm, it does. You should probably stop getting hurt love. I mean this-- this is different, but-- [ still. hurt. Rook can see it in the way the skin is red and swollen, almost like the mortal's body doesn't quite know what to do with the name pressed into his skin.
Rook leans in, presses a kiss against Jiho's neck and sighs.] You are completely insane, you know that, right? But fuck, I adore you.
When my knitting improves, I'll retire and set up my etsy shop.
[he shouldn't even joke about that. rook might hold him to it, and what even is his power to deny him these days, jiho shudders to think.
but his words do lead him to think of something else, something deeply unsettling. jiho looks back at him as much as he can while rook works the ointment into his feverish skin.]
You won't feel it now, will you? It's not that kind of bond, right?
... that sounds like a great plan. We should practice knitting more then.
[ you are correct in assuming he will hold you to that. as much as Rook understands why he does what he does, why he protects the way he does, that doesn't mean he likes the idea of Jiho out and about in danger all the time.
there is always the fear that, even with him being nearby, he won't be fast enough. won't get there in time. it just takes one moment, one heartbeat--
no. not the time. Rook sighs shakily, finishes with the ointment but doesn't stop running his hands over Jiho. turns the touch into something meant to ease out knots and tension. moves until Jiho it between his thighs and it wouldn't take much for Rook to pull him back against his gold-flecked chest.]
No. No I don't think I would. [ though maybe that would be better...] Just means that I'm harder to summon away from you. Bound by blood now. And-- well might make me a bit, uh, off for a while.
[ he will be more ivory and gold for a while, trying to figure out just what this means, how this might affect them.] Haven't been bound to anyone in... well, since before Rome fell so...
[jiho snorts softly. yeah, he's going to have a hard time talking himself out of that one. he hums, both at the feeling of the ointment already working its magic and the demon's touch in general. there's so much gentleness in it, so much reverence. jiho's never known a touch like rook's before, and he knows he could search forever and not find it again. he even starts to lean back against him, until his shoulder reminds him that it hasn't forgiven him yet. that turns it into more of a half-lean.]
I'll be more careful.
[more, an upgrade to the promise he's made in the past, the promise to be careful. he never would've dreamed of making that promise, but he never dreamed of having someone he loved the way he loves rook. jiho's no fool, he knows that rook hurts when he hurts, even if he doesn't feel it physically.] You are unfair to every other man on this planet.
Is this your new look? [he reaches his hand up into the other's hair, curls his fingers before pulling him down for a kiss over his shoulder.]
[ 'thank you' gets stuck somewhere in Rook's throat as he presses his lips to Jiho's spine, knowing that he means what he says about being careful. knows that he does not make promises lightly. and Rook knows that he cannot make Jiho promise to stop, not now. not yet (maybe never, but Rook hopes that one day they will be safe enough, that the world will be different enough, that he can dream). for now-- more careful is enough.]
I'm-- what? I mean, I know I'm luckier than any other being on this planet. [ and you bet your ass he is going to be as cheesy as fuck as he gives the assassin a pointed look.] I have you, so--
[ and yeah, maybe Rook kisses a little harder, a little deeper, smile blinding and bright when the kiss breaks to nose along the lines of Jiho's cheeks. there is a content noise in the back of his throat as he watches the other between heavy lidded eyes. he feels-- languid. a little hazy. almost like he might if his powers were in effect but not quiet because he still feels like himself.]
Hmmm, maybe. Usually... usually a bonding happens because someone wants... well they want my abilities. [ his body; lust and desire and dripping in gold. ] But your intention was... pure? I don't know what that means for my powers though.
[ a pause ]
Are you-- fuck, you've never seen me in my demonic form have you. Shit, I'm sorry.
You are pretty fucking lucky. Men look like they could eat me alive when I walk into a bar.
[jiho smiles at him, only semi-serious. he thinks that they're both lucky, with this strange bond of theirs, giving each other what they really needed. it's funny how people know all the best cuts of meat, but they'll willingly overlook the best parts of a person. neither of them wear their best parts on the outside.]
And you do have me. [he adds, a little quieter. rook could put his name on his skin too if he wanted, drape over him in public and tell it to the world. jiho's bothered by none of it, because it's just the truth.] Pure. That's me. I have been wearing white more lately.
[actually...he has, and jiho knows why. white is rook's color, for him. he won't spill blood when he's wearing white.]
Whatever it is with your powers now, we'll figure it- [he stops, brows lifting at rook's sudden apology.] For what? You're still you. I don't give a shit if you have horns and cloven hooves, you'd still be keeping my back warm tonight.
[ and men might just vanish off the face of the earth if they do that when Rook in in the vicinity because-- well, he isn't prone to violence but there are always exceptions. and he is well aware that Jiho will always be an exception for him, always be what he wants to protect in his own way. so he doesn't respond but well maybe he presses a little closer.
thinks of how it is his name on Jiho's skin and no one else's.]
And you have me, always. [ the words are soft, truthful, and maybe there is a tremor beneath them because Jiho keeps talking and being so reassuring and fuckfuckfuck he is -- this is--
there is movement where Rook shifts them so that Jiho is pushed back into the pillows of the bed and the demon is curled up, half on top of him and half next to him, face pressed (hidden) in the crook of his neck. ]
I love you. Fuck, so much. [ a kiss against Jiho's heartbeat.] This is-- more or less it, the gold takes up more room, and the wings are heavier usually but...
[rook needn't trouble himself with doing it, not when there isn't a man alive who jiho wouldn't knife on the demon's request. a big part of that comes from knowing his gentleness: if rook wanted someone dead, there'd be no doubt in jiho's mind that they deserved it.
there's trust between them in other ways too, the way that jiho moves so willingly when rook turns their bodies. the assassin curls his arm around his head, the better to play with his hair while holding him close. he lets those words sink under his skin, deeper than the brand itself, warming him versus the burn of it. he loves him too. he's told rook that, hopes he really believes it. hopes he knows it even better than he knows the name that jiho carries too now.]
Does any of it hurt? Are you uncomfortable in any way?
[ there is a thought there that, even if he were to be doused in holy oil, to be branded with the blade of a seraph right now, he would not feel the pain for Jiho's arms around him. there is nothing more important, more calming, than that familiar heartbeat in his ears and the cadence of Jiho's voice as it resonates in his chest. he would carry the weight of these useless wings a thousand times over if it meant Jiho would stay here with him a little longer.]
No, not really. It's-- [a tremor, gold shining a little brighter and curling along the tendons of Rook's neck, a flare of something tangible in the wings as the seem to flutter as best as solid gold wings can.] It's what I am, truly now. Gilded and a little useless but for show.
[ he doesn't mean for the familiar bitterness to taint his words, but it is so much a part of this form that it just seeps into his words. he realizes, too late, what it sounds like.]
It's just-- the wings are heavy. But flightless. [ an echo of a smile. ] Irony I suppose. You don't-- you really don't mind it at all?
[jiho's angry at those words too. rook isn't useless, he's not for show. he's achieved the impossible, and he didn't do it with his body. it was all his heart. if anyone else said something like that about rook, it would be the last thing that they ever said.]
I don't mind. [honest. quiet. a bit of softness meant only for rook. he slides his hand gently against one of the wings.] I'm sorry that they're heavy. If I can do anything to make them lighter, tell me, okay?
[ maybe he is more than a fancy show dog now, but that is what he had been for so long, there is still much of that lingering in him despite Jiho burning most of it away. burns even more of it away as Jiho's fingers move slowly against the edges of the feathers, wings trembling as if they wanted to flare and press closer.
Rook shivers and swallows down a noise, eyes closed for a moment before he looks up at the assassin with something a little dazed and pleased flickering in his eyes.]
Already are, love. It's-- weird? Nice. Feels good when you touch them. [ feels good whenever Jiho touches him, but this is strange because there is part of Rook that feels like he should be more physical. that there should be more happening, more wantneedlustdesire pulsing through him, but there is just love and adoration and contentment.
his eyes slide closed again, more tremors passing through him and quiet noises on his lips.] It's weird because it's-- you don't want more? Just want me happy and I don't know what to make of that.
[ he is never in this state with someone who wants him to be happy. Rook can feel that much, whether that was the binding or just his powers at play, he doesn't know. doesn't care actually, he just wants to make sure that Jiho knows how much this is okay. how much he already is doing for him. Rook presses a kiss to Jiho's skin, keeps his lips pressed there as he smiles and speaks.]
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Rook leans in to kiss him, softly.]
I love you too, Ji. [ and so much more. he understands what Jiho is saying with having so much to say, knows that he would do whatever he could to make sure that he was understood. ] C'mon, let's wash this and get some ointment on you then, and I can explain the nuances of binding yourself to my sorry ass.
[ not that he moves at all, content to stay here under the spray with Jiho in his arms a little while longer. he feels-- safe. wanted.]
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but his smile is the same. his lips, when he leans in to kiss the assassin, are the same. it is rook, and that's the only thing that matters.]
I guess I should know those things. Probably important.
[but he's the same kind of sloth, content to just touch rook with the water streaming over their skin, kiss him the same way he always kisses him. maybe even a little deeper. but he knows that eventually one of them has to be the stronger man. so jiho stands, hands locked tightly with rook's as he helps pull him up. there's a strength there that suggests that even if he was falling over a cliff and down into nothingness, jiho would hold tight forever.
they finish washing, and drying, until jiho is sitting on the edge of the bed, sweatpants on, with rook behind his shoulder.]
This is starting to feel familiar.
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[ the words are nearly drowned out by the sound of the water, by the kisses that Rook leaves against Jiho's lips. they get up eventually though, the demon letting himself be pulled and led from the shower, more than happy to follow Jiho wherever he went. it was ridiculous and absurd but so true, the would follow Jiho to the gates of heaven even if it meant his demise.
but for now-- for now it just means towels and warm sweatpants, the ointment fragrant and familiar in his palms as he presses it as gently as he can into Jiho's skin.]
Hmm, it does. You should probably stop getting hurt love. I mean this-- this is different, but-- [ still. hurt. Rook can see it in the way the skin is red and swollen, almost like the mortal's body doesn't quite know what to do with the name pressed into his skin.
Rook leans in, presses a kiss against Jiho's neck and sighs.] You are completely insane, you know that, right? But fuck, I adore you.
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[he shouldn't even joke about that. rook might hold him to it, and what even is his power to deny him these days, jiho shudders to think.
but his words do lead him to think of something else, something deeply unsettling. jiho looks back at him as much as he can while rook works the ointment into his feverish skin.]
You won't feel it now, will you? It's not that kind of bond, right?
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[ you are correct in assuming he will hold you to that. as much as Rook understands why he does what he does, why he protects the way he does, that doesn't mean he likes the idea of Jiho out and about in danger all the time.
there is always the fear that, even with him being nearby, he won't be fast enough. won't get there in time. it just takes one moment, one heartbeat--
no. not the time. Rook sighs shakily, finishes with the ointment but doesn't stop running his hands over Jiho. turns the touch into something meant to ease out knots and tension. moves until Jiho it between his thighs and it wouldn't take much for Rook to pull him back against his gold-flecked chest.]
No. No I don't think I would. [ though maybe that would be better...] Just means that I'm harder to summon away from you. Bound by blood now. And-- well might make me a bit, uh, off for a while.
[ he will be more ivory and gold for a while, trying to figure out just what this means, how this might affect them.] Haven't been bound to anyone in... well, since before Rome fell so...
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I'll be more careful.
[more, an upgrade to the promise he's made in the past, the promise to be careful. he never would've dreamed of making that promise, but he never dreamed of having someone he loved the way he loves rook. jiho's no fool, he knows that rook hurts when he hurts, even if he doesn't feel it physically.] You are unfair to every other man on this planet.
Is this your new look? [he reaches his hand up into the other's hair, curls his fingers before pulling him down for a kiss over his shoulder.]
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I'm-- what? I mean, I know I'm luckier than any other being on this planet. [ and you bet your ass he is going to be as cheesy as fuck as he gives the assassin a pointed look.] I have you, so--
[ and yeah, maybe Rook kisses a little harder, a little deeper, smile blinding and bright when the kiss breaks to nose along the lines of Jiho's cheeks. there is a content noise in the back of his throat as he watches the other between heavy lidded eyes. he feels-- languid. a little hazy. almost like he might if his powers were in effect but not quiet because he still feels like himself.]
Hmmm, maybe. Usually... usually a bonding happens because someone wants... well they want my abilities. [ his body; lust and desire and dripping in gold. ] But your intention was... pure? I don't know what that means for my powers though.
[ a pause ]
Are you-- fuck, you've never seen me in my demonic form have you. Shit, I'm sorry.
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[jiho smiles at him, only semi-serious. he thinks that they're both lucky, with this strange bond of theirs, giving each other what they really needed. it's funny how people know all the best cuts of meat, but they'll willingly overlook the best parts of a person. neither of them wear their best parts on the outside.]
And you do have me. [he adds, a little quieter. rook could put his name on his skin too if he wanted, drape over him in public and tell it to the world. jiho's bothered by none of it, because it's just the truth.] Pure. That's me. I have been wearing white more lately.
[actually...he has, and jiho knows why. white is rook's color, for him. he won't spill blood when he's wearing white.]
Whatever it is with your powers now, we'll figure it- [he stops, brows lifting at rook's sudden apology.] For what? You're still you. I don't give a shit if you have horns and cloven hooves, you'd still be keeping my back warm tonight.
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thinks of how it is his name on Jiho's skin and no one else's.]
And you have me, always. [ the words are soft, truthful, and maybe there is a tremor beneath them because Jiho keeps talking and being so reassuring and fuckfuckfuck he is -- this is--
there is movement where Rook shifts them so that Jiho is pushed back into the pillows of the bed and the demon is curled up, half on top of him and half next to him, face pressed (hidden) in the crook of his neck. ]
I love you. Fuck, so much. [ a kiss against Jiho's heartbeat.] This is-- more or less it, the gold takes up more room, and the wings are heavier usually but...
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there's trust between them in other ways too, the way that jiho moves so willingly when rook turns their bodies. the assassin curls his arm around his head, the better to play with his hair while holding him close. he lets those words sink under his skin, deeper than the brand itself, warming him versus the burn of it. he loves him too. he's told rook that, hopes he really believes it. hopes he knows it even better than he knows the name that jiho carries too now.]
Does any of it hurt? Are you uncomfortable in any way?
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No, not really. It's-- [a tremor, gold shining a little brighter and curling along the tendons of Rook's neck, a flare of something tangible in the wings as the seem to flutter as best as solid gold wings can.] It's what I am, truly now. Gilded and a little useless but for show.
[ he doesn't mean for the familiar bitterness to taint his words, but it is so much a part of this form that it just seeps into his words. he realizes, too late, what it sounds like.]
It's just-- the wings are heavy. But flightless. [ an echo of a smile. ] Irony I suppose. You don't-- you really don't mind it at all?
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[jiho's angry at those words too. rook isn't useless, he's not for show. he's achieved the impossible, and he didn't do it with his body. it was all his heart. if anyone else said something like that about rook, it would be the last thing that they ever said.]
I don't mind. [honest. quiet. a bit of softness meant only for rook. he slides his hand gently against one of the wings.] I'm sorry that they're heavy. If I can do anything to make them lighter, tell me, okay?
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Rook shivers and swallows down a noise, eyes closed for a moment before he looks up at the assassin with something a little dazed and pleased flickering in his eyes.]
Already are, love. It's-- weird? Nice. Feels good when you touch them. [ feels good whenever Jiho touches him, but this is strange because there is part of Rook that feels like he should be more physical. that there should be more happening, more wantneedlustdesire pulsing through him, but there is just love and adoration and contentment.
his eyes slide closed again, more tremors passing through him and quiet noises on his lips.] It's weird because it's-- you don't want more? Just want me happy and I don't know what to make of that.
[ he is never in this state with someone who wants him to be happy. Rook can feel that much, whether that was the binding or just his powers at play, he doesn't know. doesn't care actually, he just wants to make sure that Jiho knows how much this is okay. how much he already is doing for him. Rook presses a kiss to Jiho's skin, keeps his lips pressed there as he smiles and speaks.]
....everything's amazing. You're amazing, fuck.